*Rolling On the Floor Laughing My GladRags Off

Well, we’ve read your funny period stories and have painstakingly selected our favorite four.  Thanks to everyone who submitted a story for this contest — we loved reading them all!

Now it’s up to our blog readers to decide who will win a Pad Sampler Kit for sharing their silly anecdote with the world!  Vote for your favorite story using the poll below.  Click “Read the rest of this entry” to read each finalist’s entry.  This poll will close 3/24, so vote now!

Be sure to comment after voting — one lucky voter will win a secret prize!  Please include your email address when commenting so we can get in touch if you’re the winner.

“Rocket Man” — Laura

When he was little, my nephew would come stay with my husband and I. We would meet my sister at a convenience store about half-way between our houses.
This one time when he was about 4 or 5 we met at our usual place and I loaded all his gear in my car and then sat down in the driver’s seat and looked over at him in the passenger seat (this was before passenger side airbags) Because he was still so young, his feet stuck straight out, and there, tucked under the shoelaces of each of his shoes was a tampon-cotton part only. I casually asked him what he had in his shoes. He responded, “Those are my ROCKETS!” I motioned for my sister, who was parked next to me, to roll her window down and then told her to look at her son’s shoes. Through her tears of laughter she said, “I wondered why everyone in the store was looking at us so funny!”
My nephew is now 20 but we still love to remind him of his “rocket” days!

“GladRag Doll” — Jenni

I’ve worn GladRags for some years now and never realized how much public praise I had given them until recently. My sister and I took my mom to see the musical /Jersey Boys/ when it was at the Fisher Theatre here in Detroit. We all loved the music and spent the evening bopping our heads and politely tapping our feet in time with the show. All was going well until we got to Frankie Vallie and the Four Seasons’ hit song, “Rag Doll.” The actor playing Frankie crooned, “I’d turn your sad rags into glad rags if I could,” and my mother and sister both burst into laughter and began pointing at me. Apparently, I had talked about GladRags so much that “such a pretty face should be dressed in lace” was immediately replaced in their minds with, “Hey, Jenni wears those things, right?!” They managed to settle down and enjoy the rest of the show, but the entire car ride home included a healthy discussion of why GladRags should consider adopting “Rag Doll” as its theme song.

“Tie a Red Ribbon” — Andrea Jo

I’m pretty open about everything to everyone, which has landed me in hilarious situations more than a few times in my life, particularly when I was in the dorms as a college freshman, roommate-less and eager to not have to buy disposables. I had run across the idea of sponges during the day and sleeping on towels at night, but had somehow missed the entire market of cloth pads, in spite of the fact that it was 2007, I was an avid internet appreciator, Computer Science student, and I had read Inga Muscio’s book. Still, I had a pretty good system during the day and was down to panty liners because of the leaks any time I would laugh, but I was struggling with keeping my blood on the towels at night and not on the sheets, which was of course the goal. I had two red towels, a hand towel and a full bath towel. I would keep the hand towel between my legs and sleep on the other towel folded over, but most mornings I would wake up with everything messed up because I move in my sleep. As I said, I’m very open about these things, so stories of my trials and errors were told with gusto at the dinner table, and my friends knew what was up when the red towel was down off the towel rack in my room, including the guy I started seeing. He was also a very open person when it came to bodily functions, being a biologist, and after he took a bit to get over his very intense phobia of human blood (I’ve seen him woozy after stubbing his toe), he spotted opportunity in having a towel right there on the bed where others would have just been grossed out. But even he didn’t know how to handle it when he came over on a really bad day and out of sheer frustration I had tied a red ribbon around my waist, over the short ends of the hand towel to keep the long end up between my legs. I answered my door with that and a sweater on. I was so upset that I immediately demanded that he not say anything about my appearance, and all he could do was laugh, doubled over, and reply that it looked like a diaper. When I got more upset, he walked me over to my mirror and told me to look at myself. Even hormone ridden I couldn’t stop laughing for five to ten minutes. He never did quit calling it my oversized diaper, and it was a while before I discovered my DivaCup. It did help keep it from moving at night, though.

“VROOOM!” — Rochelle

Up until about 8 months ago, I’d never even heard of re-useable pads, and when I would ask the older members of my family about what women used in days gone by it was “nasty old pieces of used rags” (sounds like something you’d find on the garage floor, not very appealing) and “disposables are a God-send.” After having used the cloth pads, I will never go back! I absolutely LOVE the cloth pads!

Having said that, back when I was in High School in the early 1980’s my 2 y.o. nephew came bursting into the bathroom one day and saw my disposable pad, in it’s full glory none the less, and of course was curious. So as he asked what that was, and I, being an easily embarrassed teenager, had to think quick on my feet to answer his question as truthfully as possible and yet not get into an anatomy lesson! So I calmed myself and with a very “as a matter of fact” voice I said “it’s my menstrual cycle.”

He tilted his head and then the light bulb went on and he said “OHHHHHHHH MOTORCYCLE!!!!! VRRROOOOMM VRRRROOOOMMM!!!!” and went flying out of the bathroom saying that over and over and over!!! After about 30 minutes, he got tired of pretending to ride his motor cycle and I was quite relieved.

Then his parents came to pick him up, and he started all over again!!! He ran up to them and said “guess what? we have a motor cycle!!! VRRROOOOMMMM” I just knew I was going to have to explain what he meant, but luckily, his parents were quite preoccupied and simply replied, “that’s nice dear.” YAY for parents who don’t pay attention LOL

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This entry was posted on Thursday, March 18th, 2010 at 10:59 am and is filed under Contests and Giveaways, GladRags Stories, Humor. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.