image1.jpgIncreasingly, the aerial view of city outskirts is a predictable pattern of lined houses filling standard sized lots with cul-de-sacs and swimming pools circularly accenting the rigid geometry.  I can zoom down and picture the added attractions as everyone tries to keep up with the Joneses – the basketball hoop, the play set (with a canvassed play house if you’re lucky), the pool floats for lazing about, the ATVs for weekend trips to the open country; there always seems to be too little paycheck for too much “Can you buy me that, pleeeease??!!!”  It’s like running a race on a treadmill – it’ll wear you out, but it’ll never get you to where you need to go.

As we plug away, trying to make a career, a family and a community, and to arrive ultimately at financial independence, how do we keep perspective?  How do we remain healthily critical of our lives so that we can avoid choices that waste resources and segregate communities, and remind ourselves of the things that are truly important in life?  How do we gently nudge our neighbors and loved ones when it seems they have lost this perspective and, worse yet, when that misguided sort of life is interfering with our own potential happiness and freedom?

When communities are the kind where every house has its own slide instead of families heading to the shared park to play, people grow detached from one another and themselves.  Though they are often unfulfilled by their lives, they are surprisingly protective of their possessions and their approach.  Such a defensive attitude is a difficult thing to maneuver.  The only way to break through is with a personal connection that shows love and caring.

It can seem so appealing to go about preaching to those we consider to be doing it wrong.  “Don’t you know how important it is to recycle?  Why are you driving an SUV?  Television is BAD for children!  Look how much soda you’re drinking!”  When people are already on the defensive, protecting their way of life, will they be receptive to such attacks?

Maybe more understanding is required.  Maybe more living examples and less talking.  Maybe more love.  It is easy to criticize others; it is more helpful to learn from them about how you want to live and how they are living it better.

The next time we hear of a horrible environmental or cultural infraction, a jump to attack the “guilty parties” might better be substituted for a reflection upon our own contributions to such community upheavals.  Even if we think our lives are little, holding ourselves to high standards that set examples for others can have a shocking effect.  We might just see how powerful we really are.

Peace,

Diana