michelle-and-ruby.jpgI was at a book group the other night with delightful, intelligent, mothers of small children who have an unspoken agreement that although we choose a book every time, we're really getting together for wine and conversation. In fact, our discussions in recent meetings have barely grazed the subject of the book whose premise we were gathered under.

At our last meeting, ongoing struggles of life: marriage, children, and wellness (sleep, sex, and prescriptions) inevitably consumed our conversation. When we lingered on mental health and I put forward my belief that all issues of health stem from a root cause (oftentimes emotional or spiritual), one woman offered her menstrual cycle as an example of something that is strictly biological.

For a few days every month, she said, her personality changes-she "hates everyone" and wishes she could just be by herself for those days. Since this happens only during PMS, it is clearly just a hormonal shift, she concluded.

This group of women doesn't happen to know about my dear love for the menstrual cycle and as they continued to talk in turn about menstruation, I, for once, just listened. The verdict was unanimous-thumbs down-and when the hormonal pill that now advertises that women can simply "skip" menstruation came up, the idea was welcomed.

One woman tentatively said, "Yeah, but I feel kind of bad. Shouldn't we...you know embrace our womanhood or something?" But, no, it was good riddance to old annoying Aunt Flo.

I enjoyed getting to hear the unreserved opinions of these women, clearly quite representative of a majority of women in this culture. But I found myself in a familiar lonely position: the oddball who likes her period. As clear as it is to most women that menstruating is at best a minor nuisance, at worst a curse, it's equally clear to me the inherent value and power of it. I'm hoping to find a way to offer this perspective and not lose people. On this night, I didn't even try. It's not always time. It's a constant struggle in the business of periods-expressing a positive, even empowering view of menstruation without totally confounding people. I've always admired GladRags for the way it balances this delicate issue. It's positive without being cheesy or dippy. This can be difficult indeed.

Michelle Singer is a freelance journalist currently living and working in Montpelier, Vermont. Former GladRags employee and menstrual enthusiast, she is also a great lover of books, hiking, and wrestling with the continual confusion of feminism. She lives in a multi-generational home with all her most important fans-her parents, husband and two truly adorable children.